Shelly Crash: notas sobre el asesinato de la mente

Is that you, Remoman?

Sat, 19 Jul 2008 05:27:55 GMT

I found someone who seems to have a remo-man in gray and white. I know this is crazy and I'm not too down for emailing strangers but I had to write her an email tonight to see if she knows what breed her little guy is.. might help me get another idea on what Remo comes from.

Another pic:

... and she calls him "Short Round".. pretty neat!

Stick on eye makeup

Thu, 17 Jul 2008 12:59:43 GMT

File under: Bitch, are you fo' REAL!?!

I got a promo for these in my email this morning:

ColorOn EyeEnvy-

What it does:
Designed by a celebrity make-up artist, the ColorOn Professional EyeEnvy Kit contains peel-off mineral cream eye shadows that are 100% hypo-allergenic, long-wearing, and crease-proof. With stunning colors and avant-garde designs, these appliqués fit every eye size and shape and can be applied in minutes.

Finally, something for those of us who are too lazy to apply our own eye shaddow!

50 Movies Worth Seeing Before You Die

Tue, 15 Jul 2008 03:13:28 GMT

Everybody's been posting around Entertainment Weekly's top 100 movies.. so I made a top 50 list of my own. I'm sure I left a ton of good shit out, but without putting too much thought into it here's a list of 50 movies I think are worth seeing: cue up your netflix!

Dolemite II- The Human Tornado (Yes.. it is better than Dolemite I)
Drugstore Cowboy
Blade Runner
Wild Zero
The Plague Dogs
Great Balls of Fire
The In-Laws (1979)
Night of the Iguana
Leon: The Professional
The Big Lebowski
Big Trouble in Little China
Reservior Dogs
Dawn of the Dead
Lost in Translation
What Dreams May Come
A Clockwork Orange
The Life Aquatic
Sid and Nancy
CQ
They Live
The Warriors
The Basketball Diaries
Basquiat
L'Avventura
Wings of Desire
Less Than Zero
Man Bites Dog
The Lion in Winter
Donnie Darko
The Weight of Water
La Dolce Vita
Caligula
Rumble Fish
The Chase (1966)
Six String Samurai
Watership Down
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
The Legend of Billie Jean
The Darjeerling Limited
Love and a .45
Delicatessen
Me Without You
The Baxter
Infection
Cemetary Man
Dusk Til Dawn
Hero (2002)
Heathers
Kung Fu Master / Lord of the Wu Tang
Ladyhawke

I Avoided being scammed by Broadwayphoto.com, but still feeling ripped off

Mon, 07 Jul 2008 22:11:51 GMT

So Thursday night I broke down and decided to order a Cannon XT 350D with the kit lens for $398 from Broadway Photo (broadwayphoto.com / bwayphoto.com). It was new, in the box, etc. The price was a little more than what they had on Amazon a few weeks ago that sold out, but with shipping included it was something I could live with. It's a good camera and a good deal- or so I though.

I received an email from the company the next day (July 4th) that they needed to verify my order by phone. It didn't strike me as too odd, it's a larger online purchase. I called the number on the back during their "office hours" and got voicemail. I left a message with my name and order # and confirmed the purchase. I received an email moments later that said:

"Thank you for calling in to confirm your order # ________. I received your voice mail and I will get back to you as soon as possible, or you can call me at your earliest convenience at 1-800-307-1148 Extension 291.
Thank you for choosing Broadway Photo. "

Well, that's odd? I thought I just confirmed my purchase? I waited a few hours for my call back but after waiting all weekend I got sick of waiting so I started calling again, I gave up a few times after holding over 15 minutes but finally I waited it out and got a live person on the phone.

"Are you aware that the memory card that comes stock with the camera only holds 13 photos?" Uh, no. Upsell- memory card $89

"The standard battery that comes with the camera only lasts 2 hours and takes 10 hours to charge." Really? Upsell- larger battery and charger $89

"We can provide you with a 3 year warranty that you can service at your nearest Best Buy that breaks down to almost $29 per year." You don't say! Upsell- 3 year protection plan and another $89

Now I'm doing the math in my head while "Chip", or whatever his name is, is busy running through his script. I'm also checking out what he's saying and gosh darn it, he is right about the memory card, & the battery, etc. These are all sensible upgrades- but now we're adding close to $300 on the tab after tax and I'm not having it. I politely tell the kid I'll just take the camera and the memory card.

"But wait- what if I told you I could give you all this, and knock $30 off?"

Um.. no thanks, just the camera and the memory card please.

"Why would you want to do that?! What if I told you I could give you all this, lower the pice another $20, plus extend the warranty to 5 years, yackity smackity!?"

How much if you take that down to 3 year warranty? "Can't do that, sorry. I can only offer you this package with a 5 year warranty." Well then, I think I'll just take the camera for now.

"Oh gosh Michelle, I'm sorry. While we were talking I just received an email that we're all sold out of the camera without the package." So you're saying that you won't sell me just the camera? "No, I'm sorry, we're all sold out of the camera- but I can still offer you the camera in the $630 value package!"

You know what- just cancel my order.

I would have expected something like this if the camera they were offering was at some unbelievably low price- but the camera was on sale on Amazon for even cheaper withouth the hard sell. To refuse to place my order without the upsells is insane. I don't know why I feel so let down and dissapointed- I guess I'm just bummed I have to start the shopping process all over again.

Rock-Afire Explosion: The Movie

Mon, 07 Jul 2008 17:13:46 GMT

I can't wait until this comes out:

"With the closing of Showbiz Pizza Place in the early nineties, and the subsequent removal of the Rock-afire Explosion, a small but determined group of fans persisted with the hopes of reviving their fallen obsession. It wasn't until 2007, with the resurgence of the Rock-afire Explosion on YouTube with songs like "Ms New Booty," "Hey There Delilah," and "Love in This Club," that the animatronic band found its way back into the public consciousness. Chris Thrash, a car salesman from Phenix City, Alabama who recently purchased a Rock-afire Explosion, has led the charge with his inventive programming and clever song choice. Aaron Fechter, creator of the Rock-afire Explosion and sole employee of Creative Engineering Inc., has worked closely with his fans and in conjunction with his starsof.com website with the hopes of revitalizing what was once a 300 employee, 20 million dollar per-year industry."

Pat always knows how to cheer me up

Grave Robbing Ian Curtis

Thu, 03 Jul 2008 17:52:07 GMT

Ian Curtis memorial stone stolen

I know at my age nothing should surprise me, but somehow some things still do.

Check out these Sweet Items made by my Best Friend!

Thu, 03 Jul 2008 14:22:31 GMT

Etsy
Buy Handmade
melissahatesyou

No words

Fri, 27 Jun 2008 19:21:43 GMT

This picture is the awesomeness:

Brad Elterman Gallery - Lots of other hot shots- check it out.

Shit dude!

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 20:48:57 GMT

So I've been shopping around hardcore for a new digital camera since mine is biting the dust. I was overjoyed when I tried to use my old camera a few days ago and found it was actually saving images to the card instead of erroring out! Woo-hoo! Fast forward a frustrating 30 minutes of taking pics of the puppies at play and... surprise- all the images are corrupt!

So I thought I finally found the right camera at the right price.. a Canon EOS Digital Rebel xt (EOS-350D)- I even gave it another glance last night and it was looking good- but I went back today to buy it and it's sold out!

I'm probably going to shop around and see what other deals are out there but I thought I'd throw it out to you guys as well. Can I get some good digital camera reccomendations? I want to go with a digital SLR instead of a "point and shoot" because I really love having that control over the pictures I take, but I'm open to all options.

The case of the Mysterious Morphing German Officer

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 17:07:54 GMT

Now hollywood biographers will not only change the things you've done- they'll change your FACE!

Richie Valens wasn't nearly as photogenic as Lou Diamond Phillips and Leonardo DiCaprio isnt' the spitting image of Howard Hughes. Sam Rockwell doesn't look a lick like Chuck Barris and Robert De Niro isn't quite the right ethnicity to play "Lefty" Rosenthal, but this doesn't stop "Confessions of a Dangerous Mind" or "Casino" from being great films.

So why then would United Artists (or someone in the Cruise PR camp) feel the need to doctor a photo of Claus von Stauffenberg (the German officer who attempted to assassinate Adolf Hitler / Operation Valkyrie) to resemble Tom Cruise, who plays him in a new movie?

Original Photo - "Valkyrie" movie PR released photo released with photo of Tom Cruise as Claus von Stauffenberg

Now somehow when this "controversy" first arose I missed out on the action, which is disappointing because I love when photoshop hacks get busted & adding Tom Cruise's brand of closeted crazy to the mix is just added bonus. Fortunately today it caught my eye when Slate, where the story originally appeared, was forced to print a retraction.

United Artists is claiming the "photo" of Stauffenberg they distributed can be found in "a Getty Images database, credited to the Hulton Archive and dated circa 1943", and thus are forcing outlets which picked up the story to print retractions. I call bullshit!

Are you fucking shitting me!? Do you know how easy it is to add a record to an image database? Is it beyond comprehension that someone with the scope of influence and financial resources such as as United Artists could have easily slipped someone a few bills to upload an image to a database and insert a few lines of text?

Let's look at the evidence:

Slate comparison of the AP file photo of Stauffenberg to the Valkyrie PR version

This is more than just a matter of raising the contrast- this is clearly a doctored photo. The mouth and upper lip show the most obvious changes in my opinion, but one also can't deny there were changes made to the shape of the head- most noticeably the back of the skull, as well as the contour shadow beneath the cheekbone and on the chin.

My comparison of Valkyrie PR version of Stauffenberg to Cruise promotional photo

When laying Cruise's Valkyrie headshot (in blue) over the version of Stauffenberg released with it for the film (in red) the profile similarities were pretty striking. I found almost an exact match on the brow ridge, nose bridge, lips and chin. The tip of Cruise's nose comes a little lower and the ears do not line up, but the eyes are pretty close in position as well as facial shadows.

When laying the AP file photo of Stauffenberg (in green) over Cruise's Valkyrie headshot (still blue), there are less similarities. The brow ridges, lips and chin are no longer a match, Cruise's eye falls below Stauffenberg's, and the facial shadows noticeably differ.

The two Stauffenberg pictures, the photo most commonly credited as being of Stauffenberg from the AP archive and the one released by "Valkyrie" PR, clearly stem from the same photograph. What motive would anyone have, prior to modern times, to doctor or change the original photo? Going on image quality alone the AP Archive photo again asserts itself to be the original. If you accept that to be true, and considering 1940's aesthetics, why would anyone add volume to a man's lips, cut back his chin or narrow his skull? Also manipulating a photograph in the days of manual photography was considerably more arduous and time consuming than what we can do today. I find the idea that someone over half a century ago would take the time to alter a photo without any clear motivation or visible accomplished goal and for that altered photo to magically have multiple features in common with Tom Cruise, who wasn't born yet and would just happen to wind up playing the subject of the photo in a major feature film a really REALLY though pill to swallow.

Also interestingly enough, the cover of "Stauffenberg: A Family History, 1905-1944", sold on amazon.com was recently changed to display the "new" Cruise-esque photo:

The change is so recent, in fact, that half of Amazon's cached pages still carry the previous cover art as well as the old cover still being displayed on the entire "Look Inside" flash demo for the book linked to from all pages.

Maybe it's just me, but when a biography advertised as, "a thoroughly researched study, written in a style which stands up to the rigours of academia and still appeals to a lay public who learn history through the usual genre of historical fiction or biography" now carries a doctored / fictionalized photo of it's subject on the cover an injustice has been done. No matter how dramatized the movie may be, movies are normally confined to the screen- here the literal "face" of this historical figure has been, at least in some regard, forever changed.

Abooga is Abogus

Tue, 24 Jun 2008 12:38:24 GMT

Damnit, I new it was to interesting to be true.

Uncontacted Amazonian Tribe Discovered to be Bunk

Something about the variety of full color body paint made it too crazy to be real.

I saved a turtle today!

Mon, 23 Jun 2008 19:59:15 GMT

I stopped traffic on Virgina today to save a turtle who was trying to cross the road.

He looked like this- only bigger: Gulf Coast Box Turtle

He was a little smaller than a dinner plate, and the cutest turtle I've ever seen. I wanted to take him home and love him, but getting him across the street in one peice will have to do for now.

Safe travels turtle man!

Awesome house

Fri, 20 Jun 2008 13:58:49 GMT

I saw this house in an article I was reading on real estate this morning, it mentioned it was for sale in the Miami area so I had to track it down on realtor and see more of it:

Here's the link to the listing on Realtor.com - Biscayne Park Home

If you launch the virtual tour you can see full size photos. My only crit would be the high polished black floors make it feel a little too sterile and the furnishings feel like they all came from the same overpriced "contemporary" furniture store. But I love the rock accents, and the pool is wicked awesome.

Thought I would share, hope you guys dig it too!

All the cool kids are doing it

Thu, 19 Jun 2008 16:25:12 GMT

Make a Joker pic and go post to selfportraits

C'mon- you know you want to!

Sausage Roll- sweet sweet pubfood

Wed, 18 Jun 2008 19:25:15 GMT

By request here what I know of the Sausage Roll!

I'm not sure exaclty how they make them at the pub, but the cheater way is to buy some premade sausage and get some of those pillsbury croissant rolls and wrap em up and bake em until they are golden brown.

I'm not a big meat eater but I've done this with several varieties of veggie sausage and they are good, though I must admit they somehow lack the moisture (read: delicious grease) that real meat sausage rolls have. Out of all the "fake" sausage products out there- the boca sausage was the driest, Veggie Patch Apple Smoked are the best.

For dip dip, I stay true to the british roots and bust out some HP sauce here, though honey mustard is another a wise choice. Also as Jess suggested earlier with some sausage varieties I bet if you took a breakfast angle and used syrup you could also find great success.

I came across these on the web- NEW Linda McCartney Sausage Rolls by Hain Celestial. they look delish, but do they carry these in the US? I don't think I've ever noticed Linda McCartney brand here?

The Internet- everything you've ever done someday will surface

Wed, 11 Jun 2008 02:18:17 GMT

Just going through some of my friend's old bands' myspace pages. Found some of my "art" from when I was 15 / 16 years old. Yikes! Ha ha.

I saw a kid wearing this shirt a few years after I drew it. I said, "Hey, I drew that shirt!" and he scowled at me and said, "No you didn't!". Dude, who would lie and take credit for that!

I guess I still draw skulls the same way. I remember Melissa was describing some flash to me and said, "the skulls look like, I don't know, skulls you would draw."

What a shitty bastard.

What's wrong with it?

Mon, 09 Jun 2008 14:50:13 GMT

Dana Carvey's face has been really freaking me out lately. Someone took the time machine back a little too far, like pre- puberty. Christ, I look more masculine than he does.

Mon, 09 Jun 2008 13:15:21 GMT

Vintage Jourgensen

Sun, 08 Jun 2008 22:25:28 GMT

"With Sympathy" is still my favorite Ministry LP.

Remo Williams- the Adventure Begins!

Wed, 04 Jun 2008 20:47:20 GMT

So, we settled on a name. Henceforth the beaner-weiner shall now be known as "Remo Williams"... and the 20 or so other nicknames I will come up with along the way.

Never heard of Remo Williams? You can learn about the adventure HERE.

So.. where did our new doogle's adventure begin? Well, his pregnant mom was stranded in a kill shelter where she and her pups were saved by a woman who runs a pekingese rescue. A very strange and lucky thing, or my little guy would have been toast.

Roughly a little more than a month ago I came across his baby pictures on Petfinder, and even thought we weren't 100% sure we wanted another dog, I couldn't help myself to put in an application.

Here are his Petfinder pictures:

I know what you're thinking, he was an odd looking mutant. I don't know, there was something about that tiny body and flying nun ears that sucked me in. Those pics were taken roughly a month ago and tt's hard to imagine it's the same dog! He's 4 months now, it will be very interesting to see how he matures going forward. I know he hasn't even been with us a whole week yet and I can swear his nose has gotten longer since he's been here.

Right now he's in that pain in the ass "Shark Mouf" phase where those tiny sharp needle like puppy teeth are on their way out so he just wants to bite and chew EVERYTHING in sight.

So that's the update... a hero who doesn't exist must save America from an enemy we never knew we had and a tiny puppy must learn to be a man through intensive potty training and "no biting" therapy.

More pictures of the new beaner- weiner

Mon, 02 Jun 2008 13:17:30 GMT

He's part chihuahua, part weiner dog / dachshund, and part unknown terrier.

I had alot more success with his "leakage" yesterday and so far so good this morning. Whew- I was worried. We're still no where out of the woods but his first day I got peed on not once but twice! Even though the new little man is still a puppy he's twice as old as when I got little Chavez. I was hoping the rescue would have put some effort into training the guy- he doesn't know any commands, he's pretty much a blank slate. While it's making things a little harder right now down the road who knows, it could have more advantages than disadvantages.

Right now the awesome names list includes:

Remo
Lando
Ash

I liked "Pablo" and "Javier" alot but they got shot down.

We're still open to suggestions- so suggest away!

Operation Boogle 2 complete

Sun, 01 Jun 2008 20:49:46 GMT

He is super cute, though he has "leaking" issues. Now what to name this guy?

Abooga!

Fri, 30 May 2008 12:43:44 GMT

Check these guys out:

New Uncontacted Amazonian Tribe Discovered

I don't know who to call, Dr. Jones or Peter Jackson.

Another pic:

What's going on down there? The wide range in full body paint colors make me suspicious.. They're so multicolored, like M&Ms. Marketing campiagn?

Sneek Peak

Wed, 28 May 2008 02:38:33 GMT

I present the first photos of what very well may become:

Boogle 2- Electic Boogaloo

He's a rescue dog, part chihuahua, part wiener, and part unknown terrier. Only time will tell, but if everything goes according to the new plan he might be living in our home as early as this weekend.

I always said if I got another dog he'd be chocolate brown and I'd have to name him Billy Dee. I don't know if I'll stick to that- I gotta get to know him a little better and see if he's smooth enough to pull off the Billy Dee Williams vibe:

"Colt 45: It works every time!"

I'm sure Pat's ot a few names kickin around in his noggin as well.

Distrubing Trend- late 80's / Early 90's UPARC fashions

Tue, 27 May 2008 05:53:42 GMT

First a brief disclaimer- I am far from being anyone's fashion icon. as I sit here typing this I am wearing a tshirt I've had since I was 15 years old, well worn, and full of holes.

I don't really keep up much with what people are wearing. I do enjoy the greater variety of tshirt material / cuts that have been coming around in the last few years. Also to whoever brought jelly shoes back- thank you. I think the jellies have been "out" for some time now, but I still keep finding places where I can pick more up. Que fantastico! But I dirgess... For the most part- if it makes you happy and you're comfortable, go for it.

Recently though I've been noticing some bad fashion.. very bad. Bad to the point I can't ignore. What's going on american hipsters? What is the deal with these bad 80's fashions?

It kind of feels influcened by old school United Colors of Benneton, early vision street wear and 80's mid western moms- lots of stripes, primary or neon colors and ill fitting denim. I've decided to call this look "Vintage Uparc". You know, dressing as if you live in the late 80's but don't know how to dress yourself.

Here are a few examples of the "Vintage Uparc" look:

What's going on here? To me it looks like an ill fitting shirt with some gross "mom jeans". "Mom Jeans" can be definded as any highwaisted denim item of clothing. Mom jeans are especially good at emphasizing the lower abdomen "pooch" area as well as giving your butt the appearance of being located lower on your body. I'd love to meet the person responsible for bringing this look back, now there's a marketing genius I would love to learn from.

Example # 2. This model probably weighs 100 lbs-

Could these pants possibly be any more unflattering? Poor girl probably hit the red bull and laxatives after she saw this campaign.

#3... I can't count how many times I've passed up a number like this in a trift store and found myself imagining what school marm or office woman may have worn it.

Obviously it belongs to a dude who loves Hawkwind, the wind in his hair and the sun on his stache.

If you guys have any additional pics to add to this thread feel free, I'm just a little bushed tonight but I know there are more great examples out there.

Take my word for it- "Vintage Uparc" is the new white belt.